Show Me The Meaning of Being Lonely
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NEWSFLASHES!!!! | LINKS | RAW THOUGHTS - June 3, 2002 | KING OF THE RING Thoughts.......... | Show Me The Meaning of Being Lonely | Joint Custody | PHOTOS..... | Photos - Pg 2 | Fool's Gold (Parts 1 & 2) | Fool's Gold (parts 3&4) | Fool's Gold (parts 5 & 6) | Fool's Gold (Parts 7 & 8) | Fool's Gold (Parts 9 - 11) | A Lesson in Human Relations | Have You Ever Needed Someone So Bad | Snowed In : The Hunter Christmas Eve Session | In Memoriam | Daily Log Page for 3/22/02 | Disenchanted (part 1) | Disenchanted (part 2-3) | Disenchanted - parts 4 - 5 | Postings List | Goodbyes and Other Unfinished Business - Chapter 1 | Guest Book | Contact Me | Daily Log Page for 4/3/02

This story contains SLASH themes...if this bothers you, do not go any further. However, if you're interested...enjoy!!!


      Hunter opened his eyes slowly as his alarm went off on the nightstand. He looked over to find himself alone in bed - again. Once again the pain and terror filled look etched on Shawn's face flashed before his eyes. Once again he replayed the moment he betrayed the person that loved him more than anyone else. And it hurt. It hurt badly. A knock on the door pulled him back to reality - the events in his mind had happened over a year earlier. The pain was as fresh as the day before. He tugged a pair of jeans up over his heavily muscled legs and trudged toward the door. He jerked it open - surprised to see who was standing there. Shawn. 

      "What the...when did you get here?" He asked warily.

      "That's a fine how do you do." Shawn said with a bright smile. "And to answer your question, Hunter, my flight landed an hour ago. I had to see you."

      Hunter moved from his position blocking the door and allowed Shawn to enter the room. Hunter watched him as he moved about the room - straightening things up, making coffee and a few other things. Once he was satisfied, he took a seat on the plush couch in the corner and called Hunter over to him. When they were both settled on the couch, Shawn began to  speak.

      "Well, well, well. I see that married life doesn't suit you as well  as it should." He began. "I mean shouldn't your wife be in the same room with you?"

      "Shawn, you've been gone a year - almost two, what the hell would you know about what my wife and I do." Hunter replied. "I mean, hell, if I were Stephanie I wouldn't want to be around me either. Most of the time I'm a miserable bastard."

      "And why are you so miserable, Hunt?" Shawn asked as he slid closer to the other man on the couch. "Is it because you bought into the scheme and threw what mattered most away?"

Just when it seemed that Shawn was going to lean in to kiss him, Hunter woke, realizing his time with Shawn was only in his dreams again. The radio was playing softly - one of those damn pop stations that Stephanie listens to - but the song struck a chord with him.

Show me the meaning of being lonely
So many words for the broken heart
It's hard to see in the crimson love
So hard to breathe
Walk with me and maybe
Nights of light so soon become
Wild and free I can feel the sun
Your every wish will be done
They tell me
Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why I can't be where you are
There's something missing in my heart

Hunter sat up on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands. His mind was filled with thoughts of Shawn, so much so that he hardly realized it when Stephanie slipped up behind him and started kissing the back of his neck. She'd grown used to being called Shawn or something like it when she and Hunter made love. It no longer bothered her. He turned his head and caught her kiss. As their tongues danced, he felt a familiar stirring in his loins, but as usual, in his mind he had Shawn's tongue sliding between his lips and Shawn's hair tangled tightly amongst his fingers. He couldn't look at her in this way and see Stephanie - if he did he'd only hate himself because he saw so much of Vince in her every time he looked at her. 
      Vince - now that man is a piece of work. First, it was that the Kliq couldn't work a TV angle together cause the fans might get the wrong impression. Then, it was Hunter being held back because of the "curtain call". Then, when he and Shawn were finally given the green light to do D-X, Vince told Hunter that he'd owe him a favor someday down the line.  He was devastated when he had to pay up. Vince told him that Shawn had to be eliminated. That Shawn's injuries were a liability that the company couldn't carry any longer and since he was in debt to Vince, it was on his shoulders to get rid of Shawn. The writers had come up with a plan and all Hunter had to do was execute it. He did as he was told and once the cameras were off of him, he was sick. Literally, sick to his stomach to the point that he couldn't keep anything down for two or three days afterward. He'd orchestrated the public demise of Shawn's career on national television.  Granted, Shawn would show up in other non-wrestling capacities afterward, but a man that he'd nurtured and loved stole the part of his career that he loved most from him.

Life goes on, as it never ends
Eyes of stone observe the trends
They never say forever gaze
If only guilty roads to an endless love
There's no control
Are you with me now
You every wish will be done
They tell me
Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why
I can't be there where you are
There's something missing in my heart

      As usual, he closed his eyes tightly when he finally thrust himself into Stephanie. She always looked so hurt when he'd go for her ass instead of her cunt, but he couldn't help himself. He tried. When they were first married, he made a conscious effort to give her what she wanted in that way, but his heart wasn't in it anymore. However, he would occasionally give in to her and he did go down on her at least twice a week. So she never complained and she knew that he was scarred and broken hearted over the whole situation with Shawn, so she never pushed the issue with him. He came inside of her and pulled out - ashamed of himself for hurting her. He made his way into the bathroom of their suite to shower and vomit. 
      As he stood under the hot water spray, he could again see Shawn in his mind. He remembered the way they made love in the shower after the Montreal Screw Job. Shawn again was the Champ and he was on top of the world. Hunter rewarded him with a blowjob in the shower and then bottomed for him in bed until he could barely walk or sit the next day. The next day they arrived at the arena for RAW and found Vince waiting to "talk" to them.
Shawn was summoned to the owner's office first. He looked shattered and disheveled when he returned to the D-X locker room over an hour later. Hunter tried to console him, but Shawn simply told him that it was his turn. The long walk down the hall was demoralizing. He knocked on the door of Vince's dressing room. He was pulled in roughly when the door was opened. The next hour was filled with torture and humiliation that burned hotly against Hunter's soul. 
 Shawn nervously paced back and forth in the locker room while he waited for
Hunter to be released by Vince and whomever else he had in the office. A knock on the door interrupted his train of thought. Pat Patterson was standing there holding Hunter's clothes, shoes, watch and belt in his hands. Shawn took the items silently - fearing what condition Hunter would be in when he returned.

"What have I done?" Shawn moaned aloud. "I never should've agreed to the
change last night. I should be beating Bret tonight."

"Shawn, that wasn't possible. Bret's contract expired at midnight." Pat replied. "Besides, you know that Vince still has a hold over Hunter after the Garden incident."

"Well, it ain't right." Shawn answered. "I'm tired of Vince treating Hunter like shit because of something we did a long time ago."

"I though he worked you over in there, too." Pat replied.

"Yeah, but I've never taken as much shit from him as I probably deserve to."
Shawn answered.

A commotion down the hall interrupted them. Vince was barking orders to someone. Soon, Taker and Austin brought Hunter back to the D-X locker  room. They roughly dropped him on the floor at Shawn's feet.

"Hey, Heartbreak, looks like the boss broke your favorite toy." Taker laughed as they walked off.

Patterson helped Shawn get Hunter into their locker room. Shawn carefully
cleaned Hunter up and waited for him to wake. About an hour had passed when Hunter woke and instinctively moved to cover his body and hide his face. Shawn tucked a stray piece of hair behind his ear and stroked his cheek softly. There was a light bruise on the side of his jaw as well as bruises
on his wrists, back and ass. Hunter pushed Shawn away again and went to take a shower. Shawn sat on the couch - he only thought that his heart was broken when Vince told him what they were going to do to Hunter. He knew at the time he was in no position to argue. No one ever argues with Vincent K.
McMahon when his dick is shoved up his or her ass.

There's no where to run
I have no place to go
Surrender my heart, body and soul
How can it be you're asking me to feel
Things you never show
You are missing in my heart
Tell me why I can't be where you are
Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why I can't be where you are
There's something missing in my heart.

      Hunter - as he continued taking his shower - remembered everything that Shawn told him about that day. He also remembered that Vince told him he still had a favor to repay down the road. When the day came to set Shawn up for McMahon's goons to beat him mercilessly, he agreed. Shawn called him when he was released from the hospital after that and told him that he understood the situation and that he hadn't treated him any better than that in the months leading up to that night. Shawn had forgiven him, but he couldn't forgive himself.  Then, after the "Greater Power" story had Stephanie hating Vince almost as much as he did, Hunter conspired with her on a delightfully evil plan. Shawn had called him after RAW had went off the air the night that he'd
interrupted Stephanie's wedding to congratulate him on the ruse. Hunter told
him he had a good teacher and that Stephanie was in on the plan - including the story that would take off in the coming days that would have her initially begging for an annulment. Hunter then told Shawn that he was going to beat the hell out of Vince at the next pay-per-view. Shawn reminded him that no matter what happened in the ring - Vince always won.
Hunter turned the water off and stepped out of the shower to get dressed. Stephanie was still sleeping. He threw on his work out gear, gave his wife a kiss on the cheek and headed for the gym. As he walked down the hall, he fished his cell phone out of his bag. He called Shawn. When he got the machine, he contemplated hanging up.

"Shawn, it's Hunter. I just wanted to talk to you." He stammered. "Well, I
guess I'll call you later. I miss you so much."

"Hunt, I'm here, don't hang up." Shawn's raspy voice came across the line. "What's the matter?"

"I was just missing you, a lot. That's all." Hunter answered.

"No, that's not all." Shawn retorted. "I know you better than that. What do
you need?"

"You, I need you back." Hunter whispered. "How did things ever get like

"I'm not sure and I don't really think it matters anymore." Shawn answered
softly. "So, are you coming to San Antonio or do I need to come to you?"

"I can't leave the road right now." Hunter answered. "But we'll be in Austin
on Friday. You think you can make it?"

"Wild horses couldn't keep me away." Shawn replied with a smile in his
voice. "Hunter, does Stephanie know?"

"Yeah, at least she's cool when I call your name when we're, uh, well you
know." He said embarrassed.

"I understand." Shawn said. "So, what time are you getting into Austin and
where are you staying?"

"Uh, my flight lands at 9:00am and I'm at the Holiday Inn - Town North."
Hunter said. "Shawn, I'm sorry for everything."

"Hunter, I forgave you a long time ago." Shawn answered. "Now, forgive
yourself and go on. I will see you Friday."

The End....or is it?!